The road

It's been 25 days and 13 hours since I got hurt. Every day every moment hurts, but I'm getting better every time it hurts. It hurts the heart more. I can handle getting pushed down, I can handle defeat, it only fuels my fire more. It pisses me off so deep down inside that it just makes me want to fight back more. My time is not over, I am still meant to be great, I am still meant to be a champion. I will not let anything stand in my way and I will not let something shatter my dream. I was meant to be great, I keep telling myself that.

My mother wrote that to me when I hurt my knee the second time, and I again need to repeat that over and over again. No matter how many tears come pouring out or how scared I am that everyone else around me has given up on me or that feeling of water slipping through my hands. I will not give up. I refuse with all my strength and might and courage and I believe that I can do it.

It's not easy let me tell you. It's actually very hard. To keep getting up. When reporters ask you if you are retiring after you just turned 24 and it's only really been two years of hell. I can do this, people are starving and getting raped every 13 minutes in Africa. I am not dying, I am not in a coma after being beaten for no reason. I am alive and healthy and living and loving and being loved.

It's all about the spirit of the soul. How does your soul live, breath, recover, smile and laugh? How did you teach your soul growing up what to do in life? I taught mine to have fun and be bold. Jump off the highest peak into the deepest sea. Trust your soul -- it's the only way. It's the only way to have faith. Everyday is a fight and it's always going to get worse before it gets better. I just hope that one day my happiness lasts for longer than a few months or days. I will always be searching for everlasting happiness. It surrounds me, I just need to bond with it! For now, I'm on crutches plugging away at therapy getting my leg to bend and to come up with some super interesting projects to tackle!